a yogic diary 

embrace the falling apart as an invitation to come back together in a new way

the silent yogi

is a love letter to life

an ancient mystery

my humble

dharma & destiny

if you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you

if you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you

gospel of thomas  verse 70

There is a voice of the untold.

A void of secrets so hidden and yet, burning to be told.

All the words that was never spoken.

Thus buried in the sand in the long forgotten and forsaken land.

Only brave souls wander here.

I walk the path of no path.

In the landscapes of the unknown.

In a quest to find the hidden voice buried in my heart.

A subtle whisper is calling from my depths. And yet there is only silence.

A burning inner silence.

How can I speak that which was never spoken?

How can I bring forth the words from the naked corners of my heart?

I feel so silent and yet so wildly open. The shield of my heart has been brutally broken.

I walk as blind and yet I see.

Beyond the sense of separation there is no you and no me.

There is only a longing to touch and be touched.

To love and to be loved.

To lay my life in the palms of God and no longer exist.

To die just to live.

As the one I was, the one I am, before I became someone.

Someone with a story of a life in which I was torn in between a sense of truth and illusion.

I can no longer breathe on that thorny edge.

I am called into transparency. It is the spirit of my heart.

My sacred pledge, my human life and earthly destiny.

So now I stand naked before the portal of no return.

It is beyond my will to decide my path and fate. I surrender to the sacred wisdom of my spirit.

I am nothing without the mystical essence of my faith.

I have travelled so far and wide in the wilderness of the human soul.

To find that which cannot be found. It cannot be found because it was never hidden.

It already dwells in the spacious heart of existence.

In the sacred fields of my innermost home.

Come my love, lean closer. You are not alone.

See, there is a pristine auspicious space beyond the shallow life which is pure silent.

The space is infinitely wide and gracious.

Expanding herself beyond the borders of the human mind.

So sublime transparent and divine.

The silence I speak of has no beginning nor an end.

She has no birth and no death.

Her spacious sound is interwoven into all and everything and yet, she is beyond sound.

She reveals herself as a sacred silent mystery.

Breathing her love within all eternity.

She is woven into the whole existence and the very pure essence of who we are.

Beyond our human tragedy and yet so close to the heart.

By tragedy I do not judge human life to be devastating.

I only point to the deep suffering and despair so many of us explore as we journey along in life.

Despite all the agony and suffering, I love my human life.

I have a deep and loving relationship with the human experience of life.

But upon my initial meeting with silence I was sore aching in pain.

Hopeless tempted by the lethal edge of life.

So close to the abyss.

My body was fragile. My heart was broken.

My wounds were bleeding so unhealed and open.

My soul yearned to find rest. I gave up. I gave my life to God. I surrendered.

Take all of me I whispered.

A sword of truth pierced my heart and called forth the stillness of my spirit.

Suddenly I found myself in a portal of silence.

In the sacred chamber of my heart and beyond. Held by an omnipresent love so intimate and deep.

She felt so spacious wide and yet breathing within all of me.

I had no sense of my bodily shape and boundaries.

I did not feel my beginning nor my end. I only felt a transparent sense of infinity.

Touching my heart with an echo of eternity.

I saw it all before my inner eye. I saw that which cannot be seen nor spoken.

The unspeakable mystery within all of us.

An unfading silent presence.

Upon the edge of life and death and all existence.

The portal of silence saved me from the abyss.

It did so because it revealed to me the sacred mysteries of life.

It revealed to me the true nature of who I am beyond my illusory mind.

For that I am so grateful.

The portal of silence is a portal of love.

Infused by love we touch upon the mystery of God.

See, deep inside none of us is broken.

In the pure essence of the heart we are all pristinely untouched, unharmed and unbroken.

I invite you to find that pristine place deep inside of you.

I invite you to soothe your aching heart.

Beyond the savage human mind, all the agony and inner wounds, there is only love.

A love so intimately woven into the pure essence of what you breathe.

Love is who you are. In the stillness of being.

May you have faith in the sanctuary of your heart.

May you return to love and innocence.

The imperishable holy spirit of love infused in you and me and all existence.

Behold my love.

There are thousands of witnessed before you who claim that you are held by the palms of love.

You are a part of a sacred love story.

The tale of your soul is written into the book of life.

You are the one who makes the tale come fully alive.

So breathe my love.

Breathe the heart of your soul into life.

The portal of silence can lead you into intimacy with the one who breathes you.

The sacred mysteries of silence is now softly engraved in my heart.

I have explored her transparent nature and infinity.

The void of silence in which she speaks.

The spacious love in which she breathes.

An intimate touch of God and eternity.

There is no me without the breath of her nature.

No me without the breath of the holy spirit and her divine rapture.

She is love and I am the lover.

I am love and she is the lover.

She is me.

In her I breathe.

✩✩✩

the silent yogi

is a shala of silence

an echo of poetry & art

in the alchemy of my spirit

& the soul legacy of

my heart

there is light within a man of light & he lights up the whole world

if he does not shine, he is darkness

gospel of thomas  verse 24,3

she is a solitary artist & mystic

known as the silent yogi

unfolding herself through

yoga, art & poetry